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One Night Stand

Updated: Aug 10, 2020

The definition of a "one night stand" (ONS) is casual sex with someone who you don't see yourself brining home to thanksgiving dinner. Now for one night AND ONE NIGHT ONLY, you get a free pass as to who you want to hook up with. This means GNO went a lil cray and somehow you're at some club, and your best friend- brother's-home boy hooked you guys up with bottle service and now you're knee deep into the "you guuuuysss, i love you guys so much" Now the rules are as follows: if you have a ONS with a complete john doe, hey good for you! but now you realize its 5am, and you're in his NYC apartment that smells like weed, week old take out and axe body spray, not to mention the massive headache you have from the night before. So here's what you do, you quietly grab your purse and shoes, as to not wake up the stranger whose sleeping next to you, with your head held high, you walk out that apartment, call an uber and get the hell out of there! there is absolutely no reason to stick around from your ONS mainly because you have little to know idea what the heck went on last night. did you use your real name? did you make a drunken fool of yourself? and the most important question to ask... was he any good? I mean drunk or not, bad sex is pitiful no matter what stage you're in. So before you get any ideas on how to make this ONS a long lasting relationship, just remember that Jim, Bob, whatever his name is, probably doesn't have a clue as to what happened last night either and will most likely be on his way to his next appointment to get laid in a couple of hours. He is not worth it. So moral of the story, Yeah enjoy your ONS, but that's all it is, nothing more. Just remember to avoid eye contact with the cute old lady on the 3rd floor while you're doing your walk of shame 😜

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